Date: 19th February 2010 at 6:35pm
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It’s back, after a layoff off of far too long Gunnerman’s overtly optimistic prediction service is back to delight and befuddle by guessing how many points we will make in a given month based on an arbitrary analysis. Those of you that remember the original version will note that I was hit and miss, but when it was right, it was spectacular. So without further ado, here’s my 12 point prediction. Let the ridicule commence…

Burnley (H) – seemingly not the threat they once were as Owen Coyle jumped ship to the Orcs, and Burnley don’t have the most frightening away record. They are right in the middle of a relegation battle and I can see us ploughing through them assuming the team doesn’t turn up expecting them to roll over while we score goals for fun. If we apply ourselves here properly, I can’t see anything other than an Arsenal win.

Hull (A) – ah, good old Phil “You’re getting tanned by the floodlights” Brown. With a shade of orange to rival David Dean Phil Browns ‘Ull Citeh are in a constant state of flirting precariously with the danger zone during their difficult second season in the Premier League. Despite the fallacy of us apparently not being able to cut it oop norf, we’ve happily smashed our way through the northern lesser lights this season, and so I don’t see any reason for that trend not to continue here.

West Ham (H) – London Derby’s are always a tough proposition and with West Ham still not that far from relegation they may by this point be fighting to keep clear of the drop zone. We have a decent record against the hammers and I really don’t think they have the squad to be able to match us at home. Of course, the nature of the tie means things may be more tempestuous than usual, but as with the above two sides they aren’t at the bottom end of the league for no reason, I can’t see past a home win.

Birmingham (A) – Now this is the tricky one. Alex McLeish has worked wonders up in Brum, they have a fantastic young keeper in Joe Hart, the side he has built is big, powerful, well organised and generally all the things that this Arsenal team doesn’t particularly play well against. What I’m counting on here is that if we win the previous 3 games it will set us up well for this match, and the momentum and confidence gained can push us through to gain a narrow victory against a surprisingly impressive Birmingham side.

Of course, this is all based on my opinion and due to this season being brilliantly unpredictable at times, and this Arsenal sides predisposition towards making epic cock ups it is almost as likely we could end up losing all of these, resulting in a quite obscene amount of egg on my face. With that said, I sincerely believe those four games are winnable with the squad that we have, and if we have any chance whatsoever of sneaking away with the league we have to win these games.

If we make some improvements in terms of our mentality, organisation & defensive discipline before these games are played. We might just be in for a very happy March.

Niko, how’s your balls? (please see forums for Niko’s – probably tongue in cheek, but I don’t care – assertion that he would tattoo Gordon Ramsey’s face on to his scrotum should we win every league game until seasons end)